COMMITCRIMES
Dept. of Version ControlPermanent RecordCC-2011-285-1KMH
8-6-4-2-0-
kelseyhightower
Inmate@kelseyhightower

HT: 14.6 yrs on record

Kelsey Hightower

Misdemeanant
A.K.A.@kelseyhightower, Kelsey Hightower
M.O.Go, Shell, Dockerfile
Member Since2011
Known Associates24108 followers
Prior Convictions196 repos
StatusCONVICTED

Sentence

39 years

Charges filed · 5 count(s)

  • § 290-1Disturbing the PeaceMISDEMEANOR12y

    11 commits logged between 1 and 4 AM

  • § 311-2Sabbath BreakingMISDEMEANOR10y

    29 commits pushed on weekends. Touch grass.

  • § 496-0Repo HoardingMISDEMEANOR9y

    196 public repos. Some of these you forgot exist.

  • § 101-3Failure to NameMISDEMEANOR6y

    2 repos named like "untitled" or "final-final"

  • § 510-7Abandonment of PropertyMISDEMEANOR2y

    2 repos left for dead: no stars, untouched 1yr+

The State of GitHub v.

@kelseyhightower

commitcrimes.dev

Filed in the District Court of Diff · Hon. Judge git-blame presiding · no real statutes were consulted
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